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My head was hurting really bad until I wrote that last entry. Now its just about okay but I still have that disoriented feeling, like I was working in a kitchen and someone forgot to turn on the fan that sucks up the oven fumes. Like a bad high.

Last night I tried to make a list of what I want, what I really want and the first thing on the list was "stop thinking about myself as much". The other altruistic things were being a tutor, asking other people to tell me their dreams, and releasing positive energy or becoming once again a conduit of love.

So the best thing for me to do is move to Gainesville FL after the summer and go to UF. I need to be around a community of educated people. And, I won't know anyone so I won't know where to get in with the wrong crowd again.

The trouble is, I've become insanely attached to my parents. When I got fired today, I thought, "Oh, great, I'll be off tonight for the Butchies show in Jax." But I ended up hanging with my parents AGAIN. I don't know if there is a word for this condition but whatever it is, I never thought it would happen to me. I love living with my parents. They make great roommates. They replace eveything they use up and they never bring home strange loud drunks in the middle of the night.

Yep, time to move away.

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